And one out of a million people would probably have a few sentences. Maybe I should make the link come here directlyHey! It's pathetic. were stuck in here, (alone my dear) and well problem never get out so dont start to shout. Especially that duct tape. I am back. "lower the quality"? Wellit's not. Seeyahmmm..I wonder if there's subliminal stuff in my computerI'm back. Ooooothats a great idea! | 14.35 KB, We use cookies for various purposes including analytics. I'm already half way there, since I conclusivly proved (in Physics class) that gravity actually causes things to slow down and EVENTUALLY GO UP! You seeknowledge is good. | 13.63 KB, JSON | Python | Before you know it, we'll have orange alligators, pink tigers and blue lions. And "Mr. Owl" replies "OneTwooThree! How did you ever guess? All the other internet writers have nothing on me, except they're better at advertising, having a central theme/plot and basically more talented. This confirmed my suspicion that she only went so that she could have the use of the church's playground equipment. And the lady representing them, calls the radio stationon a phone. Did you know that statistics prove that 45% of all statistics are completly made up by me (The Patron Saint of Paperclips)? I can usually fall back asleep (if I don't panic and think I'm late for school), but the stupid thing wakes me up again exactly seven hours after I originally fell asleep. MOOSE! That will be a wonderous day. You knowI enjoy having these conversations with you. Goodbye for nowNow I'm back. If not, then some day, when the Internet is down and I'm really bored, I will construct a model OFCR and attempt to launch it. Oh, well. Hmmmmmmm. I fervently hope that you're not thinking the last twoespecially about Kodak. My calculator is nifty. TWEET. *sighs dramatically* I'm back. I know, I'll start of list of why it's fun/good to be insane/weird! All they do is fill out the TAB form and leave. Every single person you know could just be figments of your imagination, you could even be in a crazy house! Maybe I should put quotation marks around themnah, too much work. You feel very, very honored. Almost all of the really long sentences are under 1,000 words. Then it would be okay. I gives you imaginary IOU'shereyours. You must be caught in a time warp. So he probably didn't see the majority of my site. I thought it was sadand normal. We can only hope that the digital camera manufacturers are kinder masters than the evil Kodak Lords. 11. Get the free Lil' Ball for your traveling needs! It says that in black ander lime green! Waithowhow can I BE logic? You could travel in a straight line at the speed of light for a million years and all you'd prove is that the universe is really, really big. It was down for a whole day or so 'cause of all the traffic I got from my new quizes. My mother is a control freak, and she decided on the spur of the moment that we were going north to visit relatives. The smoke detector either never went off, or went off and the people just slept through it. That way all the members (what members) can print out a copy of it for themselves (if they didn't get that copy in the mail) I guess I'm done for the dayI know. I'm leavin', for now. Open Culture scours the web for the best educational media. Today, I was checking out some weird news. But opting out of some of these cookies may affect your browsing experience. You see, I periodically read the longest text ever to check the constant downward spiral of my sanity. I figure that even the people I manage to lure onto my site from neopets don't even bother to come to this particular page. In a moment of inspiration, I asked her who America fought. *sighs* Why does my life have to be so weird? I rule the Internet! All this information and more is yours for the low, low price of 5 payments of $29.99! No? That's why it MUST be EVIL! *content sigh* There we gothat's much better. Not my family! That's it, I'm gonna take drastic measures! William Faulkner in 1954 (Photo: Wikimedia Commons Public Domain)This post may contain affiliate links. Then they add other "stuff" in to make it TASTE pure. That's why it's here, and not some critically acclaimed site. This means that we only have a very short while to prepare. The Longest Story in The World. You don't know who Squirell is? Jesus Christ is my lord and savior.You guys probably think that that is the worlds longest sentence, but it's not,because I just keep on adding commas, and it's pretty easy, if you think about it, so anyway there is this girl at school and she's my friend, and all but she's turning . That's not fair! (Though whether it was the tan or the skimpy suits, no one will ever know.) We were supposed to write about a cherished child-hood toy, and attempt to turn our fond memories into a commercial. does not, has never, and will absolutly NOT admit to having any weaknessbesides the aformention indivduals own skin, which isn't even a weakness anyway since no representative of the Dark, Fluffier Side can BE the Patron Saint of Paperclips (Guess, whononoTHAT'S IT!) Unless he has already been destroyed by an even more radical Anti-Cartoon-Owl group. Start typing without any idea about what it is I intend to say. I don't think I have any conspiracy theoriesexcept pop-ups/pop-unders. Some are answers to e-mails, the rest are just stuff I wrote. BEWARE YOUR TOASTER OVEN! It only takes a little light to help those thingies, and smoke detectors provide more than a little. Obviously, you know this. May your day be shiney! I'll will most likely still be adding to this on my death bed. You see, most people, they don't like reading or writing. Aren't you happy? Now I can think. My mom did it to her because it was free. Then you'll see these cute little "days-of-the-week" earrings at the mall, and you'll just have to get a few sets, just in case you lose some. I'll probably have another one soon, but that whole water thing has been buggin me for awhile. Otherwise you'd think I was delusional, or something. But this proof degrades this mysterious, mystical and mystifying "quality" of my words. We slept. I founded the secret message, you ok man? After all, how can I be self derisive, and full of low expectations for this site if I KNOW people are hereseveral thousand of them in fact, in just a few months. After all, I've been to the Really Really Big Button That Doesn't Do Anything website over 50 times. And any weirdness I could come up with would be normal compared to Noodle Boy, soI bid thee farewellseeya! On video games. If iI fill out the fake tab form I'm gonna have to put back as my favorite wordI already have filled it out, though. Now I have a purpose in life! It actually lists what random minerals they through in to make it TASTE like salt. if you like our Facebook fanpage, you'll receive more articles like the one you just read! I took a whole bunch of personality quizzes and posted them there. Now, in today's society of buying groceries on-line and getting them delivered, why hasn't any other food industry marketed this ingenius idea to bring the product to the consumer. As inshe read the ENTIRE Longest Text Ever. There MUST be some sort of conspiracy involved, 'cause if there is, I can get rid of the EVIL thing! Anyway, gotta go! But, it ended up making more sense than I anticipated (scary thought, huh). Would that be considered poetic justice, or just a nice coincidence? It seems like blaggerent plagerism. You see, if the universe is indeed infinite, that means that literally EVERYTHING is possible, and in fact, is happening somewhere in the universe. I know, I took you completly by suprise. . But never senile. Some of my pages have stuff written in to make search engines recognize me, but it doesn't seem to be working. I said "The Union fought" With a crack, snaple and pop, some random synapses in her brain connected in the right order and she said "CONFEDERACY!!!" The best way to be brief is to quit now. A post shared by Worlds Best Story (@worldsbeststory). In English, and stuff, if you miss one little detail, at most you lose partial credit, but you usually get it all right. WowI really must be bored. This category only includes cookies that ensures basic functionalities and security features of the website. dont you know that you only need be afraid of fear and never anything here and certainly not a post that acts like a ghost? Would it be called DIS? -actual aids. Sofor the first time in about 5 yearsI wore a dressand something that was complelty white. I previous time when I was studying with her (American Revolution, this time) I was trying to help her remember the difference between the Patriots(Patriotic to America) and the Loyalists (Loyal to Britain) She didn't know what the word patriotic meant. Since then, hundreds of authors have been inspired by the experimental writers sentence structure, including James Joyce, Virginia Woolf, F. Scott Fitzgerald, Samuel Beckett, and other modern literature greats. PARTS BREAK AFTER OVERUSE!! The possibilities are literally endless. *enter Squirell* What's that, little Squirell? Never mind. i'll copy and paste this to my site. This entry went from saluting the PSOA to making a statement about my ideals. Air pressure. Code 452 of the Flaming Chickens Handbook states that the Patron Saint of Paperclips (ME!!!) Conviently, ice cream trucks come around during the hottest part of the year (it must be a conspiracy). HA! It would be a sin against humanity for a better site to exist. Right now, I'm just typing so that no one can say that I've been slacking off. Yes, I am. He would do everything in his power to keep his dream from becoming reality. Isn't that like a slang term for an insult? Had this been an actual emergency, we would have bought up all the can openers and charged 3 cows and a pig for each one. You say it didn't let you out? Number Six: I could have implemented one of several plans for world domination. She also is the goddess of red jello. They start out with half that number, and then just fill in words until they have the right amount. I probley wouldn't actually print this out (think how much paper it would take!) This is just a pointless excursive in spelling errors and grammatical imprecision. This sentence makes strategic use of the past perfect, two times. And that's just what I can list from memory. THE REST OF THE STUFF I TYPE WILL BE COMPLETLY IN CAPS JUST BECAUSE I CAN. I repeat, there is nothing to worry about. Everyone I know who has played that game is shocked when I tell themoh, well. It really lets me get to know you. Goodbye! To make up quotes from the non-existent Flaming Chicken Handbook, which Im sure you have a copy of. I once*embarassed pause* had "Hey, You! Ketchup: The only food that you'll want to eat after traveling to the 5th Dimension. You are deviousI give you that. "Pure" water manufactuerers are not required to list the ingredients of water, because the average consumer believes that it should be obvious. HUH? Because this is the first time I've been on a computer all day. It does all my Math for me. Hours of completly useless fun! Make your wife happy by sending her any of these romantic long paragraphs here. I think I'm so tired I can't sleep. WaitI really don't even know if anyone bothers to read this. Okay, one day, in the future, smoke dectectors will probably activate litte fire-fighter bots that every home will have. I just don't know. But untill that day, the concept of the smoke detector is useless. That also explains why normal stuff confuses me. Waitaren't I already doing that? In other words, they take all that extra "stuff" out to make it pure. I'll tell you why. It's stupid and ironic and just shouldn't exist in a better world. Any cookies that may not be particularly necessary for the website to function and is used specifically to collect user personal data via analytics, ads, other embedded contents are termed as non-necessary cookies. Any miniute now. I hope I remember doing this. This is because she memorizes the questions. Two and a half hours of homework (total) to be precise. Thank you Squirell. *yet another highly dramatic, time-consuming sigh* I need a topic. Plus, boxes are more convient than bags. Thank-you for your time. I haven't exactly advertised this site. I'm not exactly sure who they are, but: thanks! Why else would they invest all that money to show commercials in their own store? In any case, I hope you enjoyed our patheticness. [9] [10] [11] See also [ edit] Longest word in English Longest words References [ edit] ^ a b Stephen Crain; Diane Lillo-Martin (1999). By the time you're eighty, you'll have enough ear jewelry to open up your own jewelry shop. Come on, I won't hurt you, I promise! Now I'd better go and torture my Moose with it:) I am officially back.